In deciding to blog this morning, I really didn't have anything profound or thought-provoking to say. So, I will just let you know about a few things that are on my heart.
I have been thinking alot lately about friendships and relationships. Now, I am a shy person by nature and have to push myself to "get out there" sometimes. Once I do, I am usually glad. I don't seem to do well in social situations where there are alot of folks gathered, unless maybe it's family or people I know really well. I think I do better in smaller groups or even one on one situations. I think God made me this way for a reason. Maybe it makes me appear to be "anti-social" at times, but that's just how I am!
God has blessed me with a few very special friends in my life. Some still remain....one or two were only for a season.
Sometimes the way that I am can result in loneliness and isolation brought on by myself! So, although I love having just a few close relationships, at times I shoot myself in the foot, because I hang on to the familiar and don't give someone else a chance.
Why am I telling you this? I don't know! Maybe I am being too self-indulgent this morning...I apologize!
I have also been thinking about death....ok, I know....now I am being morbid! But, in just the past couple of weeks, I have heard of two women who lost their husbands suddenly to heart attacks...and they were young! This scares the bejeebers out of me...especially when I watch Tommy day after day pushing so hard at work. But, I can't worry over it...or I'll drive myself crazy! Then, of course, the shootings at VT remind me that everyday my children are exposed to the madness of this world.
I have to put these worries in God's hands and let go! I have to do that daily, hourly, minutely, secondly!
I wonder how people who don't know Christ deal? Where do they put their hope and trust? Anyway... I am not going to regurgitate words anymore.
Somebody posted a comment on one of my old posts the other day and all it said was "trash". It was an anonymous post. when I looked back and read what the post was about, I couldn't help but agree. It was trash! But, I am just expressing some thoughts and feelings...nobody has to agree or disagree with me. You don't even have to read this! It may be that a private journal is a better place for me to write my thoughts.
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2 comments:
I so much dislike being in a large group of people, it is so hard for me to meet strangers. I really have to warm up to someone before i come out of my shell. Myself I do not think I have any really really close friends, actually until 1 year ago I had only one true friend! Now a days though I think I am gaining many friends and some are closer than others of course. they are all gems to me Jen, not trash!
Very well said. Disregard the "trash" comment. People who leave comments like that are spineless weasels who hide behind the word anonymous. Me and Michael have also been hit by the spineless Christless one. Pray for them maybe they will find the way...Frank
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